No Place Like Home

Boulevard Wheat: Unfiltered. Probably the best wheat beer I've tasted. Doesn't seem like you can get it in Colorado. I ain't making it up

Cabela's

Cabela's. I have never been more out of place. There's a sign at the entrance that reads, "For your safety, please check your firearms at the guest counter." Are you serious?! Send help. I'm surrounded by Larrys. I ain't making it up.

The Commercialism I Mean Christmas Season

You tell yourself that this year you'll get all of your Christmas shopping done early. That you won't stand in line with all the rude, crazy nutjobs. But you won't, and you will. You wake on Christmas eve, and there you are. On your way to the mecca of Christmas, the mall. You arrive at the icon of commercialism, the mall. List in hand, and cursing your extraordinary ability to procrastinate. I ain't making it up.

Just Checking In

264 miles later, we're at Fat Dog's getting substandard food and fizzy, yellow beer.

Still Driving

Serene in a boring sort of way. But happy that the roads are not ice packed.

On Our Way

So we decided to try the roads this morning and head home. As you can see Colorado does a good job recovering from snowfall.

Sunshine And Mountains

Let the clean up begin. At least the sun is shining again. It's rare to go days without sunshine in Colorado.

Aftermath

I freed my car from 2 feet of snow a little while ago. I'm less than excited.

Snow's Slowing

It's almost 1pm and the snow seems to be slowing. Let the digging out begin. The good thing about all this is no one lost power. At least, not that I've heard about. The harsh part is temperatures are suppose to remain in the low 30s for the next 5-7 days. So we're not going to get the typical fast melt off.

Blizzard Update

 Blizzards are monotonous. An absurd amount of snow for an absurd amount of time. Days of snow and wind. We have accumulations exceeding two feet. Of course, it could be worse. I could be stranded at Denver International Airport with thousands of others. A little lay over turns into setting up residence in the main concourse. I ain't making it up.

Denver International Airport

DIA is closed, people are stranded and pissed. They just interviewed someone from Miami, FL. on his way to SD, CA. He's wearing flip-flops, a t-shirt and jeans.

Colorado Snow Totals

Some snow totals.

A Surreal Christmas

We're now at 11 inches of snow, with insane wind. De Chirico in Colorado. I ain't making it up.

Blizzard Update

Ok. They are now closing entire cities. I'm watching the news and phrases like, "City of Broomfield-Closed" are running. So far 11" has fallen in the Denver Metro area. We're supposed to get another foot and a half between now and noon tomorrow. I ain't making it up.

Blizzard Trek

So we're a little short on some provisions, id est, we need stuff to make chili and we're out of beer. So I dug myself out of a Long's Peak sized drift and I'm haulin' ass to the store. If you call 10 mph haulin ass. Check the pic. We have 9" of snow so far. I ain't makin' it up.

Colorado Blizzard

Anal glaucoma. I can't see my ass going outside in this weather. This is the thing. Colorado is beautiful and some of the best weather in the country. But every few years, we get dumped on. We're supposed to get anywhere from 12-20 inches. And 3-4 feet in the mountains. The timing couldn't be worse. Friday we're supposed to drive 600 miles home for Christmas. Yea, the roads should be clear by the time we head back, but they won't be. An annoying little fact about Colorado. When it comes to clearing the roads after a blizzard, they lack that certain frenetic energy. So waiting until Saturday, early morning, to make the pilgrimage seems like a better idea. Of course, Samantha doesn't find traveling on inhospitable roads as unsettling. Well, she might, but potential carnage be damned. We're going home on the scheduled date. I'm not an ardent supporter of slavishly adhering to a schedule. Oh well. I'll be working from home today. So maybe I'll write some more later. I ain't making it up.

The Cliche That Is DC-10

Doomed. Philosophical excursions into determinism versus free will are unwarranted. The walls are painted mental asylum gray. Cluttered with television monitors playing self-absorbed reminders of the cliche you're standing in. Mocking your desperation to be viewed as you sip your over priced adult beverage. But never mind that. The VIP section is a booth located fifteen feet from the entrance. And roped off with the velvet rope most commonly seen at an AMC theatre. Yeahhh. Oh and the booths are the same mental asylum gray as the walls. Monochromatism gone fucking retarded. Of course, it's possible that the owners created a living satire of the cliche that is clubs. Yeah, and perhaps Elvis and Tupac opened a 7-11 in Ecuador, too. Seriously. DC-10 is the size of a Denali and lit brighter than a pharmacy.This picture notwithstanding. I ain't making it up.